Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
