Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize