They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
