but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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