I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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