dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Randomize
