So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
