She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize