every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
