she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Randomize