You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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