We won't sleep together?
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
