Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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