But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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