I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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