Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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