Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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