Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
What drink are we having for lunch?
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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