He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
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