she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
