went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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