You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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