I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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