we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
she woke up with a sticky ear
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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