i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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