i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
