It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I can't put those talents on a resume
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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