Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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