How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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