Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
