Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
