i can't believe i had my finger in that
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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