how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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