Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize