that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
