Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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