just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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