So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Floor bacon is actually really good
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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