I don't think brook has ever known best
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
