He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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