apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
