super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
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