oh god the rape fog is back!
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize