I feel like abortions should bother me more
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
