Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
