Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize