How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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