remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
