I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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