Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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