Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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